This morning I awoke around 6, somewhat dazed. As I unscrambled there for a moment, lying warm on my pallet, I began to think about the time. Where I had been. But, where had I been? What I had done in those moments of being. I tried to put rough dates to significant events. I also tried to date the mundane routines that swallowed up so much of the insignificance.
I thought of my Mother and Father, where they came from, how quickly they went away. I thought of all the videotape I have stashed unviewed in more than 30 years, and it startles me. 30?...30 years?
I thought again of my toxic relationship with time, and the realization of how much I had wasted just trying to survive, and suddenly the irony of it crushed me to the floor.
I was awake and timeless. I arose and made coffee.
I must finally put it all together. All the clutter and clatter.
This morning I awoke around 6, somewhat dazed. As I unscrambled there for a moment, lying warm on my pallet, I began to think about the time. Where I had been. But, where had I been? What I had done in those moments of being. I tried to put rough dates to significant events. I also tried to date the mundane routines that swallowed up so much of the insignificance.
I thought of my Mother and Father, where they came from, how quickly they went away. I thought of all the videotape I have stashed unviewed in more than 30 years, and it startles me. 30?...30 years?
I thought again of my toxic relationship with time, and the realization of how much I had wasted just trying to survive, and suddenly the irony of it crushed me to the floor.
I was awake and timeless. I arose and made coffee.
I must finally put it all together. All the clutter and clatter.
This morning I awoke around 6, somewhat dazed. As I unscrambled there for a moment, lying warm on my pallet, I began to think about the time. Where I had been. But, where had I been? What I had done in those moments of being. I tried to put rough dates to significant events. I also tried to date the mundane routines that swallowed up so much of the insignificance.
I thought of my Mother and Father, where they came from, how quickly they went away. I thought of all the videotape I have stashed unviewed in more than 30 years, and it startles me. 30?...30 years?
I thought again of my toxic relationship with time, and the realization of how much I had wasted just trying to survive, and suddenly the irony of it crushed me to the floor.
I was awake and timeless. I arose and made coffee.
I must finally put it all together. All the clutter and clatter.
I was playing in a ball game. Lob ball. The three or four hitters ahead of me hit canon-like line drive base hits. I get up at bat feeling pretty confident. I get walked on four straight balls. One of the pitches was close enough to be called a strike. Really? It's a frigging dream, buddy! Hit the damn ball!
The odd thing is the pitcher was pitching from the outfield. Who says you don't need a strong arm pitching lob ball.
Oddly, last night I dreamed that a I was looking through the picture window and something caught my eye in the flower bed under the window. Some movement that was hard to process.
There, digging and sorting through stones and dirt was a little man. A gnome! He couldn't have been more than 6 inches tall. He made a little garden and disappeared. I went out and studied it for a few minutes and gently called out while tapping the ground with my finger. There, from under a mound of soil a movement and small unintelligible voice stirred.
Startled, I woke up.
I dreamed I was going to a random house to see some people and I was riding a 60's green 20" bike with hi-rise handlebars and along the way I found a fancy blue and red bike the same style with gears and extra something snazzy. I walked both bikes up to the house where a group of teenagers were hanging around. I might have been a teenager too but I didn't see myself so I'm not sure since usually in my dreams my age never seems to be apparent. Anyhow this kid was looking at the bike I found and saying how cool it was and asking if I wanted to sell it. I told him I would take $500 for it and he started pointing to the bent rims and rusty chain and so forth and so on. Then, for some reason I parked the bike I found on the porch and walked mine down to the street and parked it, then went back for the bike that I found but it was gone; stolen. I asked the kids standing around but none of them knew what I was talking about. Then I woke up...
My mind immediately went to 1968 and I had bought a chromed 10 speed for 15 bucks from a kid named Sammy. From Sears catalog I had ordered some side baskets for carrying newspapers and one for the handlebars and that winter I rode that thing on what looked like snow discs for wheels. I was hating life probably. LOL. Anyhow on Friday evenings I collected from my customers and getting to see the two ladies in the big house on Pine St. and that one lady on Louden Street apartments that always came to the door in her underwear made it all worth it.
right now listening to the rock mix just brought to mind a dream i had last night. very vivid.
this song by alt-J Tessellate (Broadbandits Afro Mix) - SOOOO VERY CLEAR in my dream from start to finish. even with the dancing meme guy from the comments (you'd have to go to the song and search the comments for it, it matches the song exactly!) - i was actually dancing with the little guy in person.
Was it a premonition? Did you awake in the fetal position? is Is that too personal of a question? Am I asking too many questions? Crap that was another question, wasn't it? Shit!
Thank you for your thoughtful inquiry. Your questions have been submitted to the department of curiosity for further ascertainment...entertainment...something...
I dreamed I was curled up in the fetal position, asleep...
Was it a premonition? Did you awake in the fetal position? is Is that too personal of a question? Am I asking too many questions? Crap that was another question, wasn't it? Shit!
I probably told this one before, but it's one that stuck with me, though it hasn't recurred. I had it maybe 10 or 12 years ago. Shiloh and I are in some kind of empty village and I decide to explore a dilapidated old house. He runs ahead of me and into the house barking. I'm calling for him to return and going from empty room to empty room. Finally I come upon him in the middle of a large room, looking down into a big ragged hole in the floor and barking. It is glowing outwardly. As I walk up to it and look down I see an open treasure chest and wake up...
By the way, the house in my Av was where my Father lived for awhile as a boy. It's long gone. No coincidence. Just a ponder. According to him it was a cold place to live. Hmmm...
