cookinlover wrote: 
you really should shave before sitting for a portrait.

 oldviolin wrote: 
That'll be Parliament then.

 Manbird wrote: 
There was a crooked man,
And he walked a crooked mile,
He found a crooked sixpence
Upon a crooked stile;
He bought a crooked cat,
Which caught a crooked mouse,
And they all lived together
In a crooked little house.

 buddy wrote: 

As far as I can see, the division of a dream into two unequal portions does not always signify a causal relation between the thoughts of the two portions. It often seems as though in the two dreams the same material were presented from different points of view; this is certainly the case when a series of dreams, dreamed the same night, end in a seminal emission, the somatic need enforcing a more and more definite expression. Or the two dreams have proceeded from two separate centres in the dream-material, and they overlap one another in the content, so that the subject which in one dream constitutes the centre cooperates in the other as an allusion, and vice versa. But in a certain number of dreams the division into short preliminary dreams and long subsequent dreams actually signifies a causal relation between the two portions. The other method of representing the causal relation is employed with less comprehensive material, and consists in the transformation of an image in the dream into another image, whether it be of a person or a thing. Only where this transformation is actually seen occurring in the dream shall we seriously insist on the causal relation; not where we simply note that one thing has taken the place of another. I said that both methods of representing the causal relation are really reducible to the same method; in both cases causation is represented by succession, sometimes by the succession of dreams, sometimes by the immediate transformation of one image into another. In the great majority of cases, of course, the causal relation is not represented at all, but is effaced amidst the succession of elements that is unavoidable even in the dream-process.

 

Nodon'tputmeonhold!  AAAAAARRRRGGGGG!

Hello, hotline. Please help me. After they make styrofoam, what do they pack it with for shipping?

 RASPUTIN wrote: 
That's funny, thanks.

Hello Manbird?

Yeah, I got your number from a friend of yours, brandog. You know, the guy with the limp and the funny shaped head whose eyes look in different directions?

Yeah well anyway he said that you were cool and that you might be able to score me some weed and hash oil.

Hello Manbird Contractors?

Yeah, your "crew" has been here since 7:00 am this morning and I'll be damned if I see any work being done! They've been smoking Luckies, playing grab-ass and listening to Howard Stern. Listen, this pool isn't going to go build itself ya know!!!!

Hello manbird hotline?

This is beaker. Listen I ordered a 20 pack of assorted condoms through your website. I think it's called the "Pleasure Pack"... yea well anyway that was like three weeks ago and they haven't arrived. Can you give me the tracking number?

 Beaker wrote: 

Where's the taser?

 Beaker wrote: 
I KNEW we should have taken a few links out of his choke chain.

Hello manbird hotline?

My name is SFW and I have a question.

Is 20% body fat really considered too much or is that just what the "experts" want you to believe?

Hello? Is this manbird hotline?

Do you have Prince Albert in a can?



You do... don't you? You sick f*ck!!!!!

 VV wrote: 

Hello, this the Manbird hotline. If you're a man interested in meeting young birds press 1. If you're a bird interested in meeting young men press 2. Please have your credit card handy.