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R.E.M. — Crush with Eyeliner
Album: Monster
Avg rating:
7.1

Your rating:
Total ratings: 2531









Released: 1994
Length: 4:26
Plays (last 30 days): 0
I know you
I know you've seen her
She's a sad tomato
She's three miles of bad road
Walking down the street
Will I never meet her?
She's a real woman-child
Oh, my kiss breath turpentine

I am smitten
I'm the real thing (I'm the real thing)
Have you seen her come around?
My crush with eyeliner

I'm in like
I'm infatuated
It's all too much - the pressure
She's all that I can take
What position should I wear?
Cop an attitude? (you fake her)
How can I convince her? (fake her)
That I'm invented too, yeah

I am smitten
I'm the real thing (I'm the real thing)
We all invent ourselves
And, uh, you know me

Yeah, she's a sad tomato
She's three miles of bad road
She's her own invention (she's her own invention)
That gets me in the throat
What can I make myself be?
Life is strange, yeah (life is strange)
What can I make myself be? (fake her)
To make her mine?

I am smitten
I'll do anything (I'll do anything)
A kiss breath turpentine,
My crush with eyeliner

I am smitten
You know me (yeah, you know me)
I could be your Frankenstein
My crush with eyeliner
I am smitten
I'm the real thing (I'm the real thing)
Won't you be my valentine?
My crush with eyeliner
Comments (207)add comment
This song occupies a specific part in my heart, since my first boyfriend asked me out by playing it. It was 2017, which made it even better, since few 18 year olds then were familiar with such songs at that time. We didn't last, of course, but it's a fun memory. XD 
 bb_matt wrote:

According to her it was. 

According to Stipe, it was inspired by the New York Dolls.  I know which source I'd trust.


Could be both. 
 tournemire wrote:

PSD has been invented for REM .... 



Agree 100 %
I like them, but it is not one of their best tunes.
 3Chords wrote:

Great song written about Courtney Love!


I'd always heard it was about the New York Dolls...

Ms. Love was (is?) one sad tomato for sure, though.
 LowPhreak wrote:

Looks like a bear that just came out of hibernation and learned that...Trump is the President.  {#Eek}


Looks like the trolls came out of hibernation too.
Great song written about Courtney Love!
PSD has been invented for REM .... 
 DeemerDave wrote:
So that's what reverb sounds like!
 
I think you mean Tremolo?
Under valued album / song BillG - pls dig into this strong (not great) REM album Peter Buck guitar is GREAT!
 Proclivities wrote:
 a_genuine_find wrote:
tompoll wrote:
Actually I believe it's tremolo, right?
I looked up both, and reverb seems more accurate: Reverberation is the persistence of sound in a particular space after the original sound is removed. When sound is produced in a space, a large number of echoes build up and then slowly decay as the sound is absorbed by the walls and air, creating reverberation, or reverb. This is most noticeable when the sound source stops but the reflections continue, decreasing in amplitude, until they can no longer be heard. Large chambers, especially such as cathedrals, gymnasia, indoor swimming pools, large caves, etc., are examples of spaces where the reverberation time is long and can clearly be heard. 
 smehan55 wrote:

Reverb is a function / effect from the amp. Tremelo is an effect from the guitar ... also known as a "twang bar." FYI, y'all.
In this song, the effect on the guitar which gives that "pulsating" effect is a tremolo setting on the amp or through an effects pedal.  There is also a lot of reverb added. Reverb simulates the sound like caves, etc. as described in your quote above, whereas tremolo turns the volume up and down at rapid intervals, giving that pulsating or "shuddering" effect.  
  Also, though the "whammy" bar on a guitar is also called a "tremolo bar", what it does is actually a vibrato effect - a variation in pitch.
I know, nerdy guitar details....
 

Sorry but on the Fender Twin amp he uses the setting is called Vibrato
 eileenomurphy wrote:

Very well stated!!!
 

Sorry to disagree, gentlemen but speaking as a guitar player, I do like the synchronised vibrato. The Les Paul guitar sound is damn good too.
 MrStatenIsle wrote:

Mmm, actually it's what bad use of tremolo on an amp sounds like.
 
Very well stated!!!
Enough with the tremolo!!! ...it makes me sea-sick! ...and I have NEVER been sea-sick, even in rough waters on a small boat, when everybody else was barfing! (while I was popping another beer)

Too Bad, this would be a great song without the annoying tremolo! ...vocals sound like Lou Reed.   good lyrics!
 DeemerDave wrote:
So that's what reverb sounds like!
 
Mmm, actually it's what bad use of tremolo on an amp sounds like.
So that's what reverb sounds like!
Real rocking song
This album was made so ahead of its time. I remember the day it was released, it was so new and fresh, if not confusing to the fans that expected Automatic No. 2.
What's the frequency Kenneth?
 Highspirits wrote:
Great rock tune and it's like Michael is channeling Lou Reed 
 
It sounds like Lou is actually singing in there. Is he? (If he is, he isn't credited...)
 a_genuine_find wrote:
tompoll wrote:
Actually I believe it's tremolo, right?
I looked up both, and reverb seems more accurate: Reverberation is the persistence of sound in a particular space after the original sound is removed. When sound is produced in a space, a large number of echoes build up and then slowly decay as the sound is absorbed by the walls and air, creating reverberation, or reverb. This is most noticeable when the sound source stops but the reflections continue, decreasing in amplitude, until they can no longer be heard. Large chambers, especially such as cathedrals, gymnasia, indoor swimming pools, large caves, etc., are examples of spaces where the reverberation time is long and can clearly be heard. 
 smehan55 wrote:

Reverb is a function / effect from the amp. Tremelo is an effect from the guitar ... also known as a "twang bar." FYI, y'all.
In this song, the effect on the guitar which gives that "pulsating" effect is a tremolo setting on the amp or through an effects pedal.  There is also a lot of reverb added. Reverb simulates the sound like caves, etc. as described in your quote above, whereas tremolo turns the volume up and down at rapid intervals, giving that pulsating or "shuddering" effect.  
  Also, though the "whammy" bar on a guitar is also called a "tremolo bar", what it does is actually a vibrato effect - a variation in pitch.
I know, nerdy guitar details....
I love the lyrics to this song.
Great rock tune and it's like Michael is channeling Lou Reed 
 1wolfy wrote:
It has some crimson and clover added for flavor

 
Over and over.
 LowPhreak wrote:

Looks like a bear that just came out of hibernation and learned that...Trump is the President.  {#Eek}

 
{#Lol} Yeah, that bear does look a little bewildered, doesn't he?
It has some crimson and clover added for flavor
 markybx wrote:

Like the CD cover, it's not a monster, it's a pussy cat. {#Cheesygrin}

 
Looks like a bear that just came out of hibernation and learned that...Trump is the President.  {#Eek}
let the chair dancing commence....
 Skydog wrote:

and music, 

 
Like the CD cover, it's not a monster, it's a pussy cat. {#Cheesygrin}
absolutely brilliant!!! one of REM's very best
 coccyx wrote:
opening notes gear me up for raise a little hell.  and then i'm slammed into reverse. very bad for the transmission.

 
and music, 
Please follow up with some Tragically Hip!

 
Great to hear this again, a favourite album growing up.
                                     Why do I always have to talk in riddles?
And God said, “Let there be light,” and there were headlights. I guess we're living in an golden age,
Bill u.r. ON your game following STP wit dis
 hayduke2 wrote:
Great sound on this one, from a not often positive listener of REM 

 
Yeah it's pretty decent.
Channeling Donovan.
great song and great album
Actually sounds like ripped from The Dream Syndicate, circa 1984. Interesting enough both Peter Buck & Mike Mills would be playing w/ a Steve Wynn band, The Baseball Project, from 2009 - on.
 (Banned) wrote:
I always thought this was about cross dressing.  

 

I think you may be right, if only because I found myself thinking of Buffalo Bill (from Silence of the Lambs) during the song.


Great sound on this one, from a not often positive listener of REM 
Visions of Johnny Rotten....
 lunatic wrote:




Stipe & REM hung w Cobain & Love back in the early 90s.
Cobain/Love/Grohl & baby Bean came into small Normaltown cafe late one evening late in in 93 much to the amusement of the other patrons including myself.
Live was obviously drunk as she was loud and obnoxious to the wait staff. Cobain was quiet and took care of baby Bean while Love continued to act out. My group left after awhile.
I felt really sorry for Cobain. He looked so unhappy. I wasn't shocked when I learned he was dead less than 6 months later.
 
If I recall correctly, Stipe is actually Bean's godfather.  Let's ask wikipedia:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frances_Bean_Cobain

Yup.  And apparently Drew Barrymore is the godmother.

The more you know.... 
Did he really say "her tits drip turpentine"  !?
I always thought this was about cross dressing.  
 More_Cowbell wrote:
this song is about Courney Love

 
According to her it was. 

According to Stipe, it was inspired by the New York Dolls.  I know which source I'd trust.
 lunatic wrote:




Stipe & REM hung w Cobain & Love back in the early 90s.
Cobain/Love/Grohl & baby Bean came into small Normaltown cafe late one evening late in in 93 much to the amusement of the other patrons including myself.
Live was obviously drunk as she was loud and obnoxious to the wait staff. Cobain was quiet and took care of baby Bean while Love continued to act out. My group left after awhile.
I felt really sorry for Cobain. He looked so unhappy. I wasn't shocked when I learned he was dead less than 6 months later.
 
Interesting. Had no idea that REM and Cobain were friendly. As for Courtney making a fool of herself: what a fuckin' surprise. I worked with a woman who had a personality like Love's. People in the office hated her drama and endless refills of obnoxious posturing proclamations but we all felt sorry for her because she was such a tangled ball of issues and pain. Not even worth trying find out what she's up to in a fly-on-the wall kind of way, though.

 More_Cowbell wrote:
this song is about Courney Love

  
Great song, poor choice of subject. Courtney wasn't worth Stipe's talent and effort. Let's forget her better still. 
opening notes gear me up for raise a little hell.  and then i'm slammed into reverse. very bad for the transmission.
I heart haters...
 WonderLizard wrote:
Crushed by eyeliner.


 



Stipe & REM hung w Cobain & Love back in the early 90s.
Cobain/Love/Grohl & baby Bean came into small Normaltown cafe late one evening late in in 93 much to the amusement of the other patrons including myself.
Live was obviously drunk as she was loud and obnoxious to the wait staff. Cobain was quiet and took care of baby Bean while Love continued to act out. My group left after awhile.
I felt really sorry for Cobain. He looked so unhappy. I wasn't shocked when I learned he was dead less than 6 months later.
Tolerable
unlike Counting Crows (2 songs back)
still recovering
sorry Bill
never play CC ever again
PLEASE! 
Great song, great album. Everyone knows it's the sign of real talent when you can totally reinvent your sound and still sound good. REM did exactly that with this record.
 Shimmer wrote:

Agree. I can tolerate What's the Frequency, Kenneth? every once in a while, but that's it.

 
They tried to deflect 90's music trends with this album, obviously they failed!
Turrible, jus turrible.
 drews wrote:
Would that be blue eyeliner, by any chance?


 
This was during his brief delusional "Superhero" period. Poor thing.
 More_Cowbell wrote:
this song is about Courney Love

A few years ago Rolling Stone did an article on "what happened to the post-Curt Courtney?" At one point she calls Stipe (both Hole and R.E.M. are doing shows in NYC) and suggests they meet for a drink. Then she calls the Post and a couple of other rags with the hot tip that Courtney Love and Michael Stipe are rumored to be meeting at Whatever Club for a drink.  Crushed by eyeliner.


this song is about Courney Love

We saw this live before the album was released(Chapel Hill). Man was it o so good. To this day one of the tightest concerts ever. I'm pretty critical of REM of late but in their prime you really wanted to see 'em live.


Awesome...thanks for posting!
Online Guitar Lessons


That vibrato on rhythm is pretty cool though the lead guitar seriously blows.  I'm surprised this song passed the LRC - probably 'cause of the band name sticker on it.

Would that be blue eyeliner, by any chance?




 rdo wrote:

I love REM, but this CD is unlistenable.


 
Agree. I can tolerate What's the Frequency, Kenneth? every once in a while, but that's it.

GOOD!
GREAT Segue from STP-Sour Girl !! 


Great song, greatgreat album...
But the cover's not in focus....

Good stuff. 

Cant stand Stipe usually, but this is pretty good!



Love it when Michael sings with such swagger .... sassy!


Never heard this before. Thought it was some band from the 60's. Then I heard Stype and had to come look.

Very odd song. {#Eek}
This song was about Courtney Love, right?{#Stupid}
Resonate Baby
ugh, weak output . . . a solid 3.1
Don't care what anyone says, Monster holds a very special place in my heart and I love it... Dig up a copy on vinyl and crank it up loud some time and maybe you'll start to understand what I'm talking about, especially on this song...

I love REM, but this CD is unlistenable.


 Welly wrote:
REM is one of my favourite bands of all-time . But this song is one of their lesser accomplishments, IMHO.
 
there must be something about this song, beacause I don't usually like REM, but i definitely dig this song  ..

I....wanna....be...your dog....

                                 Iggy & the Stooges, 1968

REM is one of my favourite bands of all-time . But this song is one of their lesser accomplishments, IMHO.
I know it's gonna drive the wife crazy, but this is reinforcing my recent urge to break the REM collection out and play it into the ground for a while...

I REALLY need to take the turntable out of mothballs and get the vinyl REM collection (yes, I even have Monster) and crank it up. Monster and Lifes Rich Pageant both sound AMAZING when played loudy on vinyl...
smehan55 wrote:

Reverb is a function / effect from the amp. Tremelo is an effect from the guitar ... also known as a "twang bar." FYI, y'all.

I just cannot believe I just went checking if Peter Buck's Rickenbacker (which was recently stolen, by the way, if you care) has a tremelo - it doesn't (or rather hadn't).

I've just got to stop reading the comments ...

So, what is it now? My fender tremelo sounded different before I screwed it off.

Ah, yes, should read the comments before I stop reading the comments ...


 tompoll wrote:

Actually I believe it's tremolo, right?


 
Reverb is a function / effect from the amp. Tremelo is an effect from the guitar ... also known as a "twang bar." FYI, y'all.



 On_The_Beach wrote:

Me3

  ok - let's see -you are a Canadian and you use On the Beach as your nom de RP - are you a Neil Young fan. If so - think Trans....


cathenley wrote:
I can name this song in 3 notes...


And I can name this band in three letters...

With this song playing, I'm definitely a happy tomato!
I am so tired of REM, and then this comes on and I turn it way up. I know I'm in the majority, but I love this tune. "she's a sad tomato, she's three miles of bad road...", plus I love the word smitten!
Just caught REM in Berkeley (Greek) last week. Understated, but they deliver.
I can name this song in 3 notes...
This is a great song for those very rare times when you don't have a headache, but wish you did.
tompoll wrote:
Actually I believe it's tremolo, right?
I looked up both, and reverb seems more accurate: Reverberation is the persistence of sound in a particular space after the original sound is removed. When sound is produced in a space, a large number of echoes build up and then slowly decay as the sound is absorbed by the walls and air, creating reverberation, or reverb. This is most noticeable when the sound source stops but the reflections continue, decreasing in amplitude, until they can no longer be heard. Large chambers, especially such as cathedrals, gymnasia, indoor swimming pools, large caves, etc., are examples of spaces where the reverberation time is long and can clearly be heard. Different types of music tend to sound best with reverberation times appropriate to their characteristics>
More_Cowbell wrote:
This song was written about Courtney Love
"She's three miles of bad road"... was that the giveaway? Though the 'with eyliner' part, I always found amusing because it could be Stipe, not just the 'her' of the song.
I am dispenser! I'm the real thing (the reeaal thing)!
love the pic of the "sad Tomato"!!!!
She's a sad tomato.
a_genuine_find wrote:
R E V E R B - A - L I C I O U S
Actually I believe it's tremolo, right?
jkamm14 wrote:
This album should have been called "Peter Buys A New Effects Pedal".
Still the most appropriate comment ever.
Lots of positive comments But I find this song boring Just goes to show...
This song was written about Courtney Love
R E V E R B - A - L I C I O U S
just shows to go you, I bought this a while ago, and was disappointed. Now I'm liking it pretty good.
Keep em' comin'!
Aww yeah! Kick out the jams!
I've always been a little smitten with this song.
Huge echoes of Roxy Music in this IMO -- a strange R.E.M. song but I kind of like it.
This had a great video of Japanese people lip syncing.
Always liked this one and still do.
Interesting reverb. Remind me never to listen to this song when I'm hung over.
Huey wrote:
I hear the Pixies here... I like it
I hear nothing but disjointed noise. I hate it
Should be on the 'Silence Of The Lambs' soundtrack.
MrGreg wrote:
This song defines the word "mediocre". Yes, there are musicians in a studio. Yes, they seem to have instruments. Yes, there seems to be tape rolling. Other than those, this song is completely vacuous.
Me3
MrGreg wrote:
This song defines the word "mediocre". Yes, there are musicians in a studio. Yes, they seem to have instruments. Yes, there seems to be tape rolling. Other than those, this song is completely vacuous.
What Greg said.
I hear the Pixies here... I like it
handyrae wrote:
Hey I saw them back in the day. That is -- a long time ago when they were first getting well known and before Stipe had the confidence to actually face the audience. For the whole show he sang to the back of the auditorium. It was interesting to say the least.
Huh,that explains a lot. I always thought he was a backwards assed vocalist.
fantastic guitar base
One of my fave REM songs. Great album. I would k-i-l-l to see the video clip of Dan Rather singing "What's the Frequency Kenneth?" with REM on Letterman. Talk about being a good sport: the song gets its title from Rather's mugging in NYC by a paranoid schizophrenic.
buck-arkansas wrote:
HEAVY guitar.
Lovin' it! Michael Stipe's voice usually annoys me too much but in this song it's not overpowering.
jules44 wrote:
The first time i saw them ...in 1981/2 Michael Stipe came out wearing a red velvet dress...
I believe that was during REM's short but highly regarded TransveStipe tour.
come on - honestly: what could you crush with eyeliner?
Hannio wrote:
I'm not sure what your smiley means, but I like the way it (almost) matches the reverb.
Yeah..nice point