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Index » Radio Paradise/General » General Discussion » Caretakers Of Our Parents Page: 1, 2, 3 ... 51, 52, 53  Next
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oldviolin

oldviolin Avatar

Location: esse quam videri
Gender: Male


Posted: Jul 12, 2020 - 8:42am



 kurtster wrote:

I found this on the pro side of Home Depot.  Can't find it on the consumer side.  Might as well get it and do the deed.  Lord only knows what is below and I'm not up for guessing.

But if you hadn't of replied, I wouldn't have found this.  Everything for a reason, eh ?

There's an old saying ... you're paying for your raising.  I guess that is how this works.

Thanks B.  I can exhale now.
 
If you have the one I'm referring to its under 10 buckos.
Bottom line- its a toilet.

patience my friend, especially with yourself. And you're welcome.

kurtster

kurtster Avatar

Location: where fear is not a virtue
Gender: Male


Posted: Jul 12, 2020 - 8:34am

 oldviolin wrote:


 kurtster wrote:

No, this is a different type of assembly.  I cut off the bracket on the base that holds the assembly in place.  I just found this looking for a description of the part.  May I get lucky and it will unscrew and just go back on like it looks here ?

.
 

No you would have to disassemble tank in that case.
there is an adaptation for that situation. It is a flapper and seat which will adhere to the original seat (white part). 
I haven't figured out how to post pictures yet. It is the Fluidmaster brand. It does work.

 
I found this on the pro side of Home Depot.  Can't find it on the consumer side.  Might as well get it and do the deed.  Lord only knows what is below and I'm not up for guessing.

But if you hadn't of replied, I wouldn't have found this.  Everything for a reason, eh ?

There's an old saying ... you're paying for your raising.  I guess that is how this works.

Thanks B.  I can exhale now.
oldviolin

oldviolin Avatar

Location: esse quam videri
Gender: Male


Posted: Jul 12, 2020 - 8:20am



 kurtster wrote:

No, this is a different type of assembly.  I cut off the bracket on the base that holds the assembly in place.  I just found this looking for a description of the part.  May I get lucky and it will unscrew and just go back on like it looks here ?

.
 

No you would have to disassemble tank in that case.
there is an adaptation for that situation. It is a flapper and seat which will adhere to the original seat (white part). 
I haven't figured out how to post pictures yet. It is the Fluidmaster brand. It does work.

kurtster

kurtster Avatar

Location: where fear is not a virtue
Gender: Male


Posted: Jul 12, 2020 - 8:04am

 oldviolin wrote:





'84 AS shouldn't be a big deal. Are you just talking about flapper? When you say you cut something off do you mean the little hooks on flush valve tube where flapper hooks?
There are remedies without disassembling entire toilet...
Take a deep breath my friend.
Sometimes it helps focus.
 
No, this is a different type of assembly.  I cut off the bracket on the base that holds the assembly in place.  I just found this looking for a description of the part.  May I get lucky and it will unscrew and just go back on like it looks here ?

.
oldviolin

oldviolin Avatar

Location: esse quam videri
Gender: Male


Posted: Jul 12, 2020 - 7:51am



 kurtster wrote:
Kinda hard to post a rant in here following the preceding chain, but ...

It's getting really hard to deal with my 93 yo Mom who thinks that I can fix everything at the drop of a hat and come rushing over to do it, especially when I have a hard enough time keeping up with my own problems.  Sigh.

The latest is the toilet in the master bath.  My Dad was an architect and built this house back in 1984 and of course insisted on using specific brands for various things including plumbing.  A simple flush flap in the tank fell apart due to old age and of course being old American Standard, it used unique internal parts and most are either discontinued or special order.  I am not at all familiar with AS, but I'm learning all about it now.  Being pressured to fix it ASAP, I tried a universal part and in the process of installing it, I cut off a piece that I now know is needed to put the replacement part on that would have done the job.  Of course the universal part does not work.

So now I've got to run around, find parts and take the freaking tank off the base and try and figure out how to make it all go back together properly.  I may end up replacing the whole freaking thing.  I am not a plumber.  I've been nursing one of my own for a while at that.  There was a time when I could do a lot of these things, but I'm 67 and not what I once was or even close to what I would like to be at this age.  Getting her a new computer a few months ago was fun enough, now this.

Meanwhile I've got doctor's appointments out the ying yang for both me and P, and with P down, I've been taking my Mom to her doc appointments.  It took some training to get her to make appointments when we could take her, not when she decided she should go.  Our back up car went down with rusted out brake lines and I had to put on new front calipers and hoses myself to save money because there was no way the bleeders were going to open.  The shop would have had to replace them and charged (legitimately) a lot more than I paid for them.  It took me two days to replace them.  One side per day.  That would have taken me only one afternoon back in the day.   

Yes, I love my Mother and she won't be around much longer but I am just not able to do all the things she expects me to do for her.  It makes me feel like shit that she doesn't get it.  I want to run away, hide and scream.  

Sigh ...
 


'84 AS shouldn't be a big deal. Are you just talking about flapper? When you say you cut something off do you mean the little hooks on flush valve tube where flapper hooks?
There are remedies without disassembling entire toilet...
Take a deep breath my friend.
Sometimes it helps focus.


kurtster

kurtster Avatar

Location: where fear is not a virtue
Gender: Male


Posted: Jul 12, 2020 - 7:42am

Kinda hard to post a rant in here following the preceding chain, but ...

It's getting really hard to deal with my 93 yo Mom who thinks that I can fix everything at the drop of a hat and come rushing over to do it, especially when I have a hard enough time keeping up with my own problems.  Sigh.

The latest is the toilet in the master bath.  My Dad was an architect and built this house back in 1984 and of course insisted on using specific brands for various things including plumbing.  A simple flush flap in the tank fell apart due to old age and of course being old American Standard, it used unique internal parts and most are either discontinued or special order.  I am not at all familiar with AS, but I'm learning all about it now.  Being pressured to fix it ASAP, I tried a universal part and in the process of installing it, I cut off a piece that I now know is needed to put the replacement part on that would have done the job.  Of course the universal part does not work.

So now I've got to run around, find parts and take the freaking tank off the base and try and figure out how to make it all go back together properly.  I may end up replacing the whole freaking thing.  I am not a plumber.  I've been nursing one of my own for a while at that.  There was a time when I could do a lot of these things, but I'm 67 and not what I once was or even close to what I would like to be at this age.  Getting her a new computer a few months ago was fun enough, now this.

Meanwhile I've got doctor's appointments out the ying yang for both me and P, and with P down, I've been taking my Mom to her doc appointments.  It took some training to get her to make appointments when we could take her, not when she decided she should go.  Our back up car went down with rusted out brake lines and I had to put on new front calipers and hoses myself to save money because there was no way the bleeders were going to open.  The shop would have had to replace them and charged (legitimately) a lot more than I paid for them.  It took me two days to replace them.  One side per day.  That would have taken me only one afternoon back in the day.   

Yes, I love my Mother and she won't be around much longer but I am just not able to do all the things she expects me to do for her.  It makes me feel like shit that she doesn't get it.  I want to run away, hide and scream.  

Sigh ...
kurtster

kurtster Avatar

Location: where fear is not a virtue
Gender: Male


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 8:38pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 

 
{#Hug}
Coaxial

Coaxial Avatar

Location: Comfortably numb in So Texas
Gender: Male


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 7:27pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 

 
My condolences, Alex. So sorry for your loss.{#Hug}
haresfur

haresfur Avatar

Location: The Golden Triangle
Gender: Male


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 4:02pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 

 
{#Hug}
BlueHeronDruid

BlueHeronDruid Avatar

Location: Заебани сме луѓе


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 3:53pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 

 
I am so sorry for your loss. She was a sweet lady and I remember her well from our short visit 8 years ago.
olivertwist

olivertwist Avatar

Location: Atlanta GA
Gender: Male


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 2:56pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 

 
Sad to hear this. Glad you were able to say goodbye {#Meditate} 
Antigone

Antigone Avatar

Location: A house, in a Virginian Valley
Gender: Female


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 2:45pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 

 
I am so sorry, Alexandra. So tough. I'm glad you have one more smile to add to all your wonderful memories of your mother.

Peace.
miamizsun

miamizsun Avatar

Location: (3283.1 Miles SE of RP)
Gender: Male


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 2:09pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 
 

sorry to hear this {#Hug}
ptooey

ptooey Avatar

Location: right behind you. no, over there.
Gender: Male


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 2:00pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand.
 

JrzyTmata

JrzyTmata Avatar



Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 1:12pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 

 
I am so sorry.
Alexandra

Alexandra Avatar

Location: PNW
Gender: Female


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 1:01pm

Thank you, everyone. She has passed on. It happened very quickly.

I got to say goodbye on FB Messenger. She smiled when she saw me. My sister (thank GOD someone was there from the family) told her "Alex loves you very much." And Mom squeezed her hand. 


Antigone

Antigone Avatar

Location: A house, in a Virginian Valley
Gender: Female


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 12:43pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Mom hasn't been interested in food, water, or getting out of bed in the last few days. Hospice has been called back in. This could possibly be her end time. (Even though this happened a couple of years ago, it's more likely with her being 95 now)
 
Just in case, I'm heading east tomorrow on a red-eye to be with her. 

 
Safe travels, and peace to your mom, and you. {#Meditate}
BlueHeronDruid

BlueHeronDruid Avatar

Location: Заебани сме луѓе


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 12:29pm

 Alexandra wrote:
Mom hasn't been interested in food, water, or getting out of bed in the last few days. Hospice has been called back in. This could possibly be her end time. (Even though this happened a couple of years ago, it's more likely with her being 95 now)
 
Just in case, I'm heading east tomorrow on a red-eye to be with her. 

 
Safe travels, and much love!
Alexandra

Alexandra Avatar

Location: PNW
Gender: Female


Posted: Feb 7, 2018 - 12:23pm

Mom hasn't been interested in food, water, or getting out of bed in the last few days. Hospice has been called back in. This could possibly be her end time. (Even though this happened a couple of years ago, it's more likely with her being 95 now)
 
Just in case, I'm heading east tomorrow on a red-eye to be with her. 
ScottFromWyoming

ScottFromWyoming Avatar

Location: Powell
Gender: Male


Posted: Jan 6, 2017 - 8:09am

 marko86 wrote:
I don't know if its normal, but my sense of relief out weighed my sense of sadness

 
100% normal. With long-term illness, especially, the sadness is long since over and done with. In my case, it was small amounts of grief every day for a few years until at the end there was none left... it was impossible to even fake it. But the end does bring relief, for everyone. Relief for the end of her suffering. Relief that my Dad can get on with his grieving (he never allowed the possibility that she wouldn't survive to enter his world) and stop worrying 24/7. And relief for everyone else too, from whatever amount of stress and worry they were carrying. 
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